goodbyes

I don't like goodbyes but sometimes they're necessary. When someone dies, you say goodbye forever. . . at least until that great gettin up morning. When you send your child off to school, you say goodbye for the day. . . and welcome them home in the evening. When you're on the phone with a friend, you say goodbye to end the call. . . only to end up talking to them again an hour or so later. Some goodbyes result in temporary separation. Others, permanent. . . And those are the ones I find very hard to deal with.

Other than for death, permanent goodbyes usually come with a change of heart. In this case I didn't really have a change of heart, per say... I had a change of mindframe. I had to be completely honest with myself and see things for exactly what they were instead of what I wanted them to be and say goodbye. It was for my own good. I had to look reality in the face, with the help of what was obvious, and decide to say goodbye. And I did. No regrets.

I've learned quite a few things about myself throughout this situation and there is still more of me that I need some wisdom with. All in all, I have my self-respect back. . . and will never, EVER, let her go again. For me, goodbyes for any reason are difficult. Some more painful than others. Although this goodbye was painful, it was also inevitable. A necessary goodbye. A permanent seperation.

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